Day: January 9, 2004

All I can hear is people typing around me, even above the sound of REM on my MP3 player, but I’m not sure I can find the motivation on this drab Friday afternoon to explain in better English why you need to read the fantastically dull Protocols Porting Guide I’m writing. Is it really only the end of the first week back after the New Year? It seems like I’ve never been away. Even worse, I was just listening to Orange Crush, and I can remember exactly where I was, and the exact moment when I heard that song last. Shortly after it finished, we got out of the car on the other side of the world to go and see the lighthouse where they filmed Round The Twist. It was sunny. I wish I was there now. Or maybe anywhere but here. I think I need another holiday.

Unconnected events

Two recent, but unconnected events, that have been troubling me recently.

The first one happened at Rob’s excellent New Year’s Eve do (a party where, I’m afraid to report, this happened). The first words I heard, on being introduced to Rob’s friend Alex, a man I’d never met before, were “ah! the blogger”, as he shook my hand. Proceeding then to chat to someone I hadn’t met before who knew so much about me was certainly an odd experience–had we moved into the flat yet? had I met Dido yet? (the answer’s still no, unfortunately).

Then, earlier this week, I had an email out of the blue from one of my fellow Bristol English graduates, someone I hadn’t heard of or from for 3 years, who had stumbled across the site while doing “some research” at work (yes, that’s my excuse too) and read and (sharp intakes of breath all round) apparently enjoyed it.

I might have said this before, but it’s rather odd realising that there are actually people out there who read this thing–maybe even people I don’t know. At first its rather flattering. Of course my main reason for blogging has always been to break from work and to try to encourage myself to write properly outside of work, but it’s always nice to find out that there are people out there actually reading this and, perhaps, even enjoying it, especially people I don’t know (even if in this case it’s only because Rob doesn’t update as often as I do, although I think there’s a quality vs quantity debate there that I’m not going to go into now).

But the more I think about it, this realisation creates a kind of pressure. If there are actually people reading out there, then what if I post a really rubbish entry? What if I don’t post often enough? Will you go away and not come back?

What if I just want to link to Richard Herring’s piece on Google referral stats (although I think everyone has written one of those at one time or another), because it’s funny, but I haven’t got time to write a proper entry? Will you all leave me for him because he’s funnier and updates every day with really long and witty entries?

What if nothing funny happens to me for me to talk about here? Now that I have my shorter commute, I don’t even have the Metro letters page to point to and laugh at with righteous sarcasm…

What if I’m not good enough? Don’t leave, please…